Webster’s Dictionary defines victimology as: 1)
the study of the ways in which the behavior of
crime victims may have led to or contributed to
their victimization 2) the claim that the
problems of a person or group are the result of
victimization. I thought that was
interesting. Though I don’t doubt there is some
legitimacy in the above, here is my paraphrase
of how these views are often twisted by some
people today: 1) If I do you wrong there was
probably something you did that brought it on.
You provoked me. It’s not my fault. 2) If I am
suffering some kind of unpleasantness or crisis
I’ll look first at what society or my upbringing
or my environment has done to me. No wonder I’m
like this. It’s not my fault.
Many
people are caught in the quicksand of being a
victim. The human nature to blame someone or
something else for the bad decisions we make go
all the way back to Adam and Eve (Genesis
3:1-13). Add to that an enabler or two, be they
“friends” or talking-heads on televison, who
reaffirm that someone or something else is to
blame, and a cup of self-pity and you have the
recipe for misery. Why? Because their problems
are not their fault. Other people or God or the
alignment of the planets have been the active
aggressors to bring about their pain. They have
been nothing but passive pawns who are powerless
to improve their lot in life.
But
what does the Bible have to say about this?
Notice in Psalm 73:21-24, "When my soul was
embittered, when I was pricked in heart, I was
brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast toward
you. Nevertheless, I am continually with you;
you hold my right hand. You guide me with your
counsel, and afterward you will receive me to
glory." This passage teaches us three
corrective measures we can take to overcome
bitterness and the victim mindset:
1. Recognize the error
of bitterness (21,22)
.
That may seem too obvious. But in light
of the “it’s not your fault” gospel of
our age, people need to hear it. There
may be many reasons for one’s
bitterness, but no excuses. Notice where
the writer lays responsibility, “I was
brutish…I was ignorant…I was like a
beast toward you.” You may well have
been badly abused or treated terribly in
some way. Maybe resolution can be found
through the courts or through personal
confrontation. If the offense doesn't
rise to either of those levels you
should let it go. An abiding bitterness
hurts you and those you love.
2. Reclaim your
relationship with God (23).
Let him take you by the hand. Pour out
your heart to him in prayer. Let him
speak to you daily through Bible
reading. Stop treating prayer like a
list of gimmees (give me this, give me
that) and start seeing it as one of
God’s ways to draw you closer to him.
Meditate on his Word. Fellowship the
church at every opportunity. You be to
others what you think they should be to
you. People who are sinking in the mud
of misery, despair and loneliness have
no reason to expect their lives to
improve until they take hold of the hand
of God.
3. Resolve to walk in
his way (24).
Surrender yourself to being transformed
by God. Focus on your sins that need
repenting of and not so much on those of
others. Get outside yourself and find
ways to serve others.
Everyone has been victimized in some way. No
doubt your problems have been worse than some
and not as bad as others. But the problems are
not the problem. The problem is allowing the
problems to defeat you.
You
don’t have to stay in the quicksand. God is
offering you a way out. And he wants to receive
you to glory.
God bless you,
Brad Fry
