Tony Campolo wrote a few years ago, “Wives feel resentment when it is assumed that they are responsible for everything that goes wrong around the house. This is epitomized in the television ad in which the husband is upset because there’s a ‘ring around the collar.’ The wife breaks into tears because her detergent has not removed the dirt from her husband’s shirt. The ring around the collar is seen as telltale evidence of her failure. The ad never asks the obvious question—Why didn’t he wash his neck?”

It is human nature to pass the buck. People have been doing it ever since Adam and Eve in Eden. Adam blamed Eve and Eve blamed the serpent (Genesis 3:12,13). Aaron blamed Israel when he made the golden calf (Exodus 32:21-24). Moses blamed Israel for God forbidding him to cross the Jordan (Deuteronomy 4:21,22). Israel blamed God for taking them out of the comfortable environs of Egyptian slavery to the challenging wilderness of freedom (Deuteronomy 1:26-33). Saul blamed Samuel for his presumptuous sacrifice (1 Samuel 13:8-14). Each of these suffered for the sin they committed but they sought to shift the blame to someone else.

Today are people any different? Do we not often try to make it look like someone else is responsible for our personal failures, sins and mistakes? Perhaps the greatest tragedy of such an approach is that everyone sees through it except for the one wallowing in the pity party. God sees through it because God sees all things and he cannot be deceived (Galatians 6:7). But not only does God see through it, other people who have a sense of responsibility and accountability do as well. Buck passers don’t do well in their schoolwork and blame it on their teachers. Never mind that they don’t do their work. Buck passers don’t get promoted on the job and blame it on the boss or some co-worker with no scruples. Never mind that the cause may be that they are lazy and disagreeable. Buck passers have few or no friends and blame it on those that do. Never mind that their sour attitude alienates others. The Bible teaches us that avoiding blame that is rightly our own will set the course for a life of failure. Proverbs 28:13 says, “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.” A man “conceals his transgressions” not only when he tries to hide what he has done but also when he tries to draw attention away from what he has done and focuses that attention on someone or something else.

The best way to insure progress and success is to own up to the things we do wrong and correct them. If someone convinces himself that his problems are someone else’s fault then he is powerless to do anything to change the situation. He will always live his life at the mercy of others. Such an approach to life is not only spinning your wheels, but spinning your wheels in mud. Not only are you not going anywhere but you are sinking and not going anywhere. Instead of pointing fingers, blaming others, and passing the buck, which is a sure recipe for failure, why not change what I can change—me. Certainly that’s easier said than done. Long practiced habits and deeply engrained mindsets don’t change overnight. “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks” you might say. But you’re no old dog. God created you in his image with the capacity to be like him. You can’t do that by sheer effort. The blood of Jesus washes away our sins and nothing else can. The Spirit of God empowers us to holy and abundant living and nothing else can. But even though it is the power of God that makes all this possible you must decide to yield to him and you must resolve to follow him. Otherwise you’ll continue to sit in the mud.

God bless you,

Brad Fry